The only time Bear blotted his copybook was the very first evening.

We arrived just too late to help with fetching tables from the school and village hall but just in time for dinner.

The food had only just been served when Bear started a 'domestic'. Our longsuffering hostesses had heard it all before and were half expecting it. At least, he was told that he could get it off is chest that evening and then forget it. We were there for a party not marriage guidance.

The problem was that he had ammunition for firing red herring in that CC and Jay still haven't found much work BUT the problem lies with our relationship. I left him because I was fed up with being his 'possession'. He has given me no reason to believe that his attitude has changed so he'll have to accept being looked after on my terms - and that does not include a Derby and Joan existence tied to his apron strings.  End of story.

He sulked a bit the next day but by the time the party started he was fine.

On Saturday morning he went off with one of his daughters to see the other one and I went home with another party guest to meet her new kittens and then she took me to see Tracey (see comments box). The three of us taught at the same school.

On Sunday we went to see friends who have moved to Aylsham and admired their low maintenance garden (none of us is getting any younger). It has taken a lot of work but they now have decking, raised flower beds - where they also grow salad and vegetables - and a pergola approached by wooden  'steps' set in stones.

The lady who bought our house took us for lunch at the village pub and then showed us round our former home. She has undertaken major improvements. We were most impressed.

In the afternoon we caught up with my sister's news and then went on to visit Bear's daughter in her new home. There is an awful lot of work to be done but it's a lovely house and very interesting garden with an old arched wall. It will take time but it's going to be super.

On Monday we had lunch with friends who are trying to sell their beautiful cottage and buy a  more 'arthritis friendly' house and then we rushed into Norwich to meet Camille, our French friend's son who is studying and working there as part of his university course.

We bumped into him quite by chance the following day, which I had tried to keep clear for shopping. Bear bought himself a new digital camera and I upgraded my daughter's ancient mobile in the O2 shop. It was a good deal - £13 for a brand new phone and the girl kindly saved all the data on the simcard and put it in for me. This was so much cheaper and more straightforward than buying a mobile in France.

We interrupted the shopping to meet Bear's brother at the station. Although we got there five minutes before his train was due in we saw this little old man patiently waiting. He had taken an earlier one! We went into the buffet and risked the coffee. Poor J (he is 86) has been through the mill healthwise since I last saw him and it has taken its toll. Nevertheless he remained bright and cheerful and chatted away about the family and a recent trip to Ireland for the wedding of one of his grandsons. His wife has broken a bone in her foot (on top of various other illnesses) so couldn't come with him. He had to get home to take care of her so he only stayed half an hour. He and the Bear are half brothers so that may account for the fact that they are so completely different in character. . . .

I really had hoped for a good browse in Marks and Spencers  so I suggested the Bear might take Camille for a coffee. No way, he didn't want to do that so I found the top CC wanted and then got a couple of pairs of trousers to try on. Unfortunately there was a queue for the changing room and Bear got a bit stroppy. I stuck it out only to find that the size 16 CC usually buys for me was way too small.

Camille showed us a good place for a snack in the new Mall which has sprung up where the old chocolate factory used to be and then we said goodbye and set off to visit Beattie and her master. 

This little dog was so excited to meet new people she nearly jumped herself inside out but she calmed down and enjoyed being fussed over. She is absolutely gorgeous and I can believe my friend (a former colleague) when he says she has changed his life. His wife is still teaching but it was funny to watch  Beattie go and greet her when she came home and then sit down in front of her, tail going nineteen to the dozen. "That's because she knows she's going to get a biscuit" we were told.

For the final evening we took our hostesses to dinner at a local restaurant. The last time the Bear and I had been there it was for his birthday, years ago. We had booked a table but were kept waiting for ages until the menus were brought. Then it was a good 20 minutes before they took our order and another long wait before they announced that what I had ordered was off. We got up and left and had a birthday meal of cheese and biscuits with champagne at home.

This time, we had a very good meal but the new owners had spoiled the ambiance by changing the decor. Never mind - the food was excellent.

It has to be said that, apart from that first evening, Bear was very well behaved, so it turned out to be a most enjoyable week.

Despite the unseasonal, chilly weather it wasn't too cold to enjoy the evening - and the rain held off despite the threatening clouds.

Wine flowed freely and the food was absolutely fabulous. The music and entertainment were terrific and an excellent time was had by all.

The wimps among us went to bed at midnight but the party continued inside the neighbour's house for several hours.

There are a few photos under 'Party' if you'd like to see them.

Let me share a few 'train moments with the Bear':

On the way to Lille, Bear plonked our case down in front of a service door. I pointed out the sign saying 'leave clear - door in use' but Bear just swore at me. I picked up the case and moved to another seat. Staff were toing and froing throughout the journey. I gave Bear a 'meaningful look' the first time someone went through but he turned away.

It was my first trip on Eurostar and so I'll admit I was excited. Bear accused me of behaving like a schoolkid. So I retorted that it was better than being a grumpy old sod.

As Bear is inclined to keep the tickets in his (sweaty) shirt pocket I insisted on having them in my handbag. If I couldn't produce them instantly when required he grumbled.

While queuing for tickets at Liverpool Street, Bear couldn't quite hear that the lady behind the window was turning away anyone who tried to join the line behind him. As he approached someone else came up behind him and the lady started shouting and waving again. Bear thought she meant she wouldn't serve him so he began to get cross. I had to intervene (from where I was waiting in another queue) and, fortunately, he got the message and was quite nice to her - despite the fact that she had to inform us that if we travelled before 7p.m. it would cost £66 each but after 7 it would be £50 for both of us. Bear said he didn't want to buy the bloody train; just travel on it, so we decided to wait it out and found a seat from where we could 'people watch.'

It was actually quite interesting and made the time pass more quickly. Most passersby had very serious, almost miserable, expressions but those with a mobile attached to their ear were more likely to be smiling or grinning broadly as they talked animatedly.

The station filled with businessmen and women in suits, casually dressed travellers and holidaymakers weighed down with luggage. Most were clutching a newspaper, their ticket, or something to eat as they strode, sauntered, shuffled or bounced towards their chosen mode of transport.

Once on the train we found seats easily but it soon filled up. Bear was horrified when a chap near us put his laptop on the table of the seat next to him and a young woman put her bag on the floor by the seat beside hers and then started gossiping loudly on her mobile.

We heard all about her latest (s)exploits, her period problems and some of the bitchiness at work. It wasn't surprising that no-one challenged her for the spare seat until there was no other choice. Laptop man had soon been asked to occupy his own place but it took a more desperate commuter to interrupt her call and ask for the seat. She glared at him and complained that her luggage wouldn't fit on the rack. He said he'd put it up for her and did so. She continued her gossip a little longer but then made sure that she disrupted her fellow passenger by trying to get something out of her case.

Even though I had to agree with Bear's loud comments on these situations I certainly wouldn't have voiced them. Perhaps I'm too polite?

On Friday one of our friends in England is celebrating her 50th birthday - only fourteen months after the event! We had our invitation months ago with the warning that she would kill us and/or never speak to us again if we didn't go over.

So Bear and I have booked Eurostar for tomorrow and should arrive in time to help get things ready for Friday.

In less than a week we hope to see as many friends and family as possible.

I'm crossing my fingers that Bear will be on his best behaviour and there will be some good tales to tell when we get back.

Next post JUNE 29th. A bientot.

The Whale doesn't have that many pleasures in life so CC and Jay always make a fuss of him on Fathers' Day.

Jay went shopping for  the meal - he made lasagne and CC made her special chocalate cake - and they gave him cards and books.

The Bear, on the other hand, was not best pleased. Despite the way he has treated them in the past, CC and Jay have tried to make him feel included but he refuses to 'play happy families'. As soon as he got wind of their plans he announced he was going to an organ concert. Fine!

The sad thing was that yesterday was also the anniversary of his youngest daughter's death, four years ago. She was only 37 but had suffered from a congenital heart disease. Everyone knew she would not make old bones but that didn't lessen the blow when it came.

It's at times like these when we should be able to support each other but in view of the past few days of sulking it wasn't easy to give as much as I'd have liked. I expressed sympathy, of course, but when he said he was going to church (what!!???) I didn't offer to go along to keep him company.

During the afternoon he asked me if I'd like to go to the concert. It felt a bit like moral blackmail - "you know I'm sad today. Are you going to choose me rather than them?" - but I didn't feel inclined to give in.

Call me hard hearted and selfish, but it's not often we have a Bearfree evening to let our hair down and have a meal without his 'atmosphere' so I stayed home.

Whale was so happy to have a relaxed dinner at the table and CC and Jay were able to play their CDs without complaint from the Bear.

We had almost finished when Bear came back. He hadn't read the paper thoroughly. The concert had, in fact, been cancelled but as three people turned up the organist gave a short recital and then let them all go up to the organ loft. Bear was allowed to play and told he could have a go any time he wanted. That made him happy, so he came home in quite a good mood.

However, he spoiled our evening by switching on the TV. (We have an open plan ground floor.) Jay turned up the CD, Bear turned up the TV and so the kids gave in. We cleared away, decided to forgo coffee and went to bed.

This morning Bear admitted he had fallen asleep in front of the box and come to bed well after midnight.

I was really thrilled this morning to find that Keith has made me a banner and put it on his blog.

Despite the fact that he is older than I am he has thoroughly mastered computer technology and his blog is full of innovations that you wouldn't find on a 'readymade' blog like this one.

There was I feeling quite proud of myself for finally working out how to manage links and a favourites list and then I come across several retired bloggers who are so much more advanced.

Pat sometimes admits she has technical hitches but she's far ahead of me and Claude also has a most attractive blog.

It's an absorbing pastime, searching for new blogs, but I mustn't find too many regular reads or nothing else will get done. However, it does inspire me to try to improve.

What I really need is a few lessons from Keith but he's too far away.

Several people have indicated that the comments box on this blog is not very straightforward. I have to agree, but it has led me to try some experiments and it seems that:

a) You do have to copy the funny letters and numbers.

b) The name and password boxes can be left blank.

c) The second lot of boxes:- name, email and URL  can also be ignored but your comment will come up as anonymous.

d) You can put in your name but leave out the email addess and/or URL if you wish.

Hope this clarifies matters. And perhaps it will encourage a few more comments - please.

Ever since his birthday Bear has been in a good mood but, at the same time I am still aware of being manipulated and dominated by a fist of iron in a velvet glove.

For example: on Thursdays, Yvette and I meet up for a chat and Bear insists that he is going to take me - it's only a few minutes walk - and bring me back. In the meantime he goes to watch trains as he 'doesn't want to go back to the house with them' (i.e. Whale, Jay and CC). If it were raining Yvette would give me a lift but no, I have to watch the time and leave at 3.30 sharp so as not to keep the Bear waiting.

He manages to get his own way without appearing to be unreasonable or forceful, or perhaps I am just grateful when he's  not shouting but he does seem able to browbeat me in his own way.

BUT, today he went too far. I had bought fish to cook for lunch, but he wanted to eat at La Fontaine. So we went. We had just started our meal when he began criticising Jay and CC again, posing all sorts of questions. My response was that I'd like to be able to discuss things with him but I was not prepared to talk about my kids because he would twist my words and cause trouble.

"Like what?" He wanted to know.

"Well, like the time you told CC I was very disappointed in her because she hadn't married and produced offspring." (What I had said, while playing with a friend's toddler, was that I'd like to have a grandchild.)

"Oh that. That doesn't matter."

"But it does matter. I can't trust you not to stir things."

This was followed by more invective and then he finally announced he was ready to listen to me.

"Now you know why I can't talk to you. One word about my children and you go off on one. I rest my case."

This brought about further swearing so I got up and left: walked right out of La Fontaine without a backward glance. My word, that felt good.

I was half tempted to take the car and leave him stranded but in the end I walked to the station and got a taxi.

Once home I sent him a text: "I've come home. See you when you're in a better mood - hopefully."

His reply: "Thanks 4 msg. I'm OK and will come back soon and hope u r not so touchy as u were. It's not all MY fault u know."

Oh well, no apology there then.

Some years ago, when I was about 55, we visited friends in Hungary and were taken on a train. George bought four 'senior tickets' and I was worried that they might ask to see my passport.

The inspector came along, glanced at the tickets, looked us over and went on his way. I felt a mixture of relief and anxiety. Did I really look over 60?

Last Sunday, for the first time, I was asked to show my 'Carte Senior'. Fortunately I knew it was in my bag, even if it took a bit of finding. The conversation went a bit like this:

Me (hopefully): "Does this mean you don't believe I'm over 60?"

Inspector (seriously): "Madame, I don't think anything of the sort."

Me (with rueful smile): "Oh, I am disappointed then."

He went off grinning.

The election of deputés (MPs) in France is now timed to coincide with the presidential term and is run on similar lines. Any number of candidates can seek to stand for the first round and if anyone gets more than 50% of the vote (provided there is a big enough turnout) he/she is through without further ado.

However, what usually happens is that there is a second ballot a week later for the candidates who had the most support. Sometimes its a straight fight between the best two, or there can be three or four in the 'second tour'.

The first vote took place on Sunday and the Mayor of Charleville was standing for the Parti Socialist. We asked her husband when we met him on the station platform whether he thought her chances were good.

He shook his head. "You must have noticed. There's a big swing to the right. We're not very hopeful".

In the local paper, a chap who writes a satirical column had said that although the candidates were ostensibly celebrating the start of the TGV service they would really be wondering whether they would be travelling to Paris for free (First Class) as MPs or whether they would have to pay for their tickets in the future.

The first round results did, as predicted, indicate a massive majority for Nicholas Sarkozy but our Mayor, with 28%, is through to a second round fight with the Right wing candidate (40%). Last week the turnout was low. We'll have to wait and see if more people make the effort next Sunday.

Unfortunately, we don't have the right to vote.