It happens from time to time.

I open the door to find a dubious salesman or, occasionally a beggar.

Today it was a swarthy fellow clutching a carpet.

It was the usual sales patter:

"This is worth 200euros but I'm selling it today for 125."

"No thank you. We have a person in a wheelchair. Carpets are not practical. And, besides, I've overspent this month already"

His insistant banter made me crease up with laughter and I was amazed that he reduced the price gradually until he had reached 30 euros.

"But we have cats who will probably pee on it" was my last effort to say no.

In the end I called Bear to come to my assistance.

"Oh, it's a nice colour" he beamed. "Thirty euros? We'll get it if you like it."

The man didn't need to know any English to get the message. We couldn't wriggle out of it now without some unpleasantness.

Bear got out his wallet and drew out quite a few notes. He handed over two twenties and the man made for the door.

"I thought you said THIRTY" protested Bear. "If he doesn't give me my change he can have the carpet back."

Once again the chap got the message, handed over a battered 10 euro note and went off muttering.

"Where are we going to put it?" asked Bear when we brought the carpet through.

"I don't know." I replied. "Maybe we can put it in the living room in the Winter. Bare tiles can be a bit cold."

Some time later my neighbour called in.

"How much did you pay for the carpet?"

"Thirty."

"He offered it to us for twenty" she said.

Jay has had problems with a verucca for over a year now and has been going to a dermatologist who has tried various treatments.

The last attempt was with an injection  - or rather two - which he said should do the trick.

But it hasn't.

He is a very pleasant chap and invited us to go back to him if there was a problem. Unfortunately his secretaries are highly reluctant to let anyone get near him.

This morning I rang to explain the situation and ask if there was any hope of seeing the Doctor for a few minutes - or perhaps having a word.

No way. He was absolutely full up. The best she could do was  give us an appointment for October 16th.

 "That's rather a long time to wait, especially as he has a long drive to do."

"Your only chance is to see if your GP will get you an earlier appointment".

"Right, that's what I'll do." was my reply and we both wished each other 'Bonne journée' with cool politeness.

So I rang the surgery to find out when our doctor was free.

"She's on holiday. It will be Doctor L." said the receptionist. Hmm. We know the locum doctor quite well as it's always the same one but whether or not she'd want to argue our case with those secretaries was another matter. She's kind of too nice.

All the same, we were given a rendezvous at 3.45 and she listened to the problem and inspected the foot. She decided on two courses of action - one: a homeopathic remedy and two: phone the dermatologist.

First she typed out the prescription saying that she found there wasn't much in the way of allopathic medication for veruccas but the homeopathic approach was often successful - if long. She added that not all doctors approved (our GP doesn't) but she found it very useful.

Then she dialled the dermatologist and was most assertive but in a pleasant way. When she put the phone down she looked up and said with a satisfied smile,

"Ten o'clock tomorrow morning."

While we were waiting at the chemist's Jay wondered if we could get away with pretending to be a doctor next time we want an appointment.

Not with my accent I'm afraid.